The "Occupy Newt's Suits" Campaign

Newton Leroy Gingrich, born Newton Leroy McPherson on June 17, 1943, easily won the South Carolina GOP primary over Willard Mitt Romney, who was born on March 12, 1947 and raised in the affluent Detroit suburb of Bloomfield Hills, Michigan.

Newt’s victory speech was full of benign laudatory praise for his three opponents, and he then attacked everyone residing on the left geographically and politically. He humbly praised himself saying, “It’s not that I’m a good debater,” he said. “It’s just that I articulate the deeply-held values of the American political system.”

Newton, like Willard, Richard John Santorum and Ronald Ernest Paul, each present their own divisive us versus them ideology. Newt is the stalwart promulgator of the “reality” that conservatives, tea party people and evangelicals are the only true Americans, and those with sinister, anti-American values are the ones they must remove from office.

If It Works, Then Newt's Message Did It

Newt went on, and on, and on with that theme. “We want to run not a Republican campaign but an American campaign, because we are optimists about the future and Americans are optimistic about the future.”

Newt doesn’t mince words when he is courting those on the right, but not necessarily those who are in the right. His diatribes are reminiscent of those emanating from Jerry Falwell and the Moral Majority that was founded in 1979. Its opponent called the organization “neither moral nor a majority.”

During his post-election rally, Newt attributed his victory to “something very fundamental that I wish the powers that be in the news media will take seriously. The American people feel that they have elites who have been trying for a half-century to force us to quit being American and become some kind of other system.”

Let’s see; 2012 minus fifty years brings us to 1962, and since then we have had GOP elites in the White House thirty years, or 60 % of the time. Has Newt once again misspoken, or does he need to brush up on his math?

He focused in on the usual trigger points geographically that incite his base — the northeast establishment, Washington, and then derisively mentioned that liberal bastion of sin and corruption, San Francisco. Then it was the media’s turn to be his target.

If It Doesn't Work, The Messenger Did It

The media can be a source of aggravation to most everyone in public life. When the media’s seeks “the truth,” it may not be the truth that a politician wants exposed including Newt’s away-from-work prowess and Mitt’s income tax returns.

Newt derided the final debate’s allegedly left-wing moderator John King for opening with a question on one of Newt’s ex-wife’s claim that he wanted an “open marriage.” When Chris Wallace of fair-and- balanced Fox News was asked if he would have begun with the same lead question, he replied, “Of course, that was the elephant in the room!” A very apropos answer considering the candidate is a Republican.

Newt Outweighs Barack

Now it was time for Newton Leroy to go after Barack Hussein and he did so in his usual gentle, respectable manner saying, “If Barack Obama can get reelected after this disaster, just think how radical he could be in a second term.” He casually, or caustically, mentioned once again that while Obama is the best “food stamp president” in history, he would the “best paycheck president.” That well-planned remark elicited the expected shrieks of joy from the faithful. Newt also emphasized that his campaign was about “American exceptionalism versus the radicalism of Saul Alinsky.”

During the celebration, the audience seemed to be anxiously looking to the wings to see if Kate Smith (1907-1986) was going to be resurrected to sing “God Bless America.”

Newt Can Win, If He Gets the Votes of the Adulterers and the Obese

Newt is a larger-than-life individual and if he became the GOP’s nominee, he could be elected president if he gets the majority support of two key voting blocs, just as Bill Clinton did. After the relentless media discovered and reported on William Jefferson’s peccadilloes, Bill may have won the election by capturing the overwhelming voting support of the country’s massive adultery constituency as well as the pot smokers of America. If Newt can capture the majority of adulterers (male and female), and then get a large number of the one-third of all American adults who are obese, he may be able to capture the White House from its current, less-than-gargantuan occupant.

The "Occupy Newt’s Suits" Campaign

That brings us to the proposed “Occupy Newt’s Suits” campaign tactic which could endear him to many of the disgruntled and confused members of the Occupy Movement. That group includes members of the enormously large, 99% trod-upon element in our society; some of who have faced or are now facing foreclosure and loss of their homes.

If Newt would donate part of his expansive wardrobe to those Occupy Movement members, his suits would be quite suitable to be used as temporary shelters for small families. Then all true Americans would recognize Newton Leroy as a benevolent man of the people; one who cares for the common man regardless of the person’s religion or political party. He could help to unite all Americans, as adulterers, obese people, and those who Occupy join hands and sing at his inauguration, “This land is your land, this land is my land,” followed by “God Bless America,” with or without Kate Smith.