Friday, August 12, 2011

An Ode to Ineptitude

Think about the party, tea,

It now controls the GOpee.

When the tea party makes a wish,

Scared Republicans start to pish.

This stifles success, makes chances wetter,

But Obama now, is not that much better.

His lack of action is quite banal.

Smooth in talking, actions anal.

Problem with all of this inaction,

Our country has lost, all its traction.

We are about to run, dry as can be,

Does it really matter to you and me?

Wish this were the election year,

Both parties would live in fear.

But if we vote to throw them all out,

Those voted in will still cast doubt.

About their ability to lead a nation,

Both ins and outs are a sad rotation.

The solution is, without hesitating,

Move to a land with a AAA rating.

Oh Canada! We Stand On Guard for Thee

Saturday, August 6, 2011

The Oy Way, or Oy Vey?

While the use of the Yiddish expression Oy Vey is far more prevalent in society today, there would probably be far less of a need to utter that agony-induced phrase if people would only inculcate the calm-inducing, meditative lessons learned by following The Oy Way.

However, in this fast-paced electronic world, seemingly fraught with unattainable demands, we have little time to quietly meditate upon our condition, yet alone being able to find a small oasis to relax in, even if it’s for only an hour.

Expect or Accept?

A psychologist friend once told me that we humans expect too much and that the multitudes of disturbances that occur in our lives are just a natural part of our existence. She further emphasized that the best response is having the right attitude and learning how to accept the overwhelmingly large number of infringements that can rob us of our peace and tranquility

Here's the Rub

Earlier this week, I scheduled a massage in my living room from the masseuse who helps relieve unwanted stress for my wife and myself. Before she came, I disconnected all phones, put a sign on the front door that reads “Massage In Session, Please Do Not Disturb,” and turned on the small fountain by the window. I enjoy listening to the soothing sounds of the gently flowing water as I let my aching body succumb to healing hands.

Then as I sank deep into state of pure relaxation on the massage table, I was rudely yanked out of it by the unnerving sounds of a power mower cutting the lawn immediately outside my front door. I took a deep breath and was grateful that the insidious sounds lasted but a few minutes, as the operator moved on to the next lawn in our nine-unit townhouse complex. But the noise abatement was momentary as the man in charge of edging the lawn approached with his own instrument of aural destruction. His intrusion was also short lived, but it lasted long enough to stop any relaxing flow. Oy Vey.

Ballet Shoes and Roller Skates

These two intrusions were like a light-footed field mouse wearing ballet shoes noiselessly walking across the floor, compared to the thundering sounds of a rampaging rhinoceros on roller skates. The latter came in the form of another landscaping craftsman wearing impervious-to-sound ear plugs, who had turned his leaf blower up to the maximum disturbance level. Oy Vey.

He completely obliterated the fountain’s soothing sounds and for the next forty-five minutes, I barely felt the healing massage, and was unable to follow the advice of my masseuse. “Think of it as the sound of a swarm of bees,” she advised me. I ignored her suggestion believing that a swarm of bees flying around me would not lend itself to my peace of body and mind. Oy Vey.

The Oy Way

What I desperately needed was to remove myself from this hectic world and escape to another where peace could more readily be found. The way to realize this was to follow The Oy Way.

I have learned to do so and you, too, can follow the path of most resistance by mastering the lessons learned in The Oy Way. Rather than encumbering you with excessive, unnecessary descriptive verbiage, simply go to the source at